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May 1st, 2014

May 1, 2014

May is a weird month.

May 1st 2012 I was what I thought happily pregnant.

May 1st I was preparing for that big gender ultrasound, wondering if we were getting a boy or a girl.

May 1st I was clueless about what I would soon face.

I had a sinking bad feeling in my heart, but I tried to dismiss it. I tried to deny it. Tried to ignore it.

I didn’t believe that loss could strike me again.


I do not like you.


It is weird.

I am celebrating and cherishing this miracle God is growing in me, this precious baby boy
Yet I am still grieving, I am trying to honor and remember my baby boys brief short lives.



From → Baby Loss

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